Like the new blog look? Haha, it's the best Christmas one I could find... I suppose I should just start making my own, since I have the whole Adobe Creative Suite? :)
Anyway... God is doing some deep work in me. I still feel like I've been missing something.. something big.. and I think it's Love. God's Love.. the kind that drives me to do every single thing that I do. To get up... to hang out with people, art, clothe myself.. hehe.. but seriously. I feel like I have been doing most things in my own strength, and I think that I am scared to really truly, deeply (truly lovely deeply.. lol), let go. I'm scared of something, and I don't even know what it is. I have been such a slave to fear, and it just needs to go. I walk around with so much stupid fear. I think I really fear what people think of me. But I want to overcome this fear, and I think the best way might be by prayer. Prayer is so powerful. Just look at Who you are praying to. The Author of Life. So cool! The Builder of the Unseen. Things we don't see are like physical objects to Him. Like our thoughts.. and like love.. and fear. God sees that. He sees our struggles, and He has compassion. His hearrt is not to leave us in the dust, and when we make mistakes... He wants us to run to Him, and let Him love us, and show us how to be more excellent. We can't look at our own short-comings, because that is so depressing. We MUST look at Him. Gaze, adore, behold, imagine, meditate... on Him because He is beautiful, and you become what you behold.
I'm totally preaching to myself here... I'm waiting to be transformed. Francis Chan asked his wife one day, if she had ever thought about how a caterpillar thinks.. because caterpillars just do their own thing, and take a long nap and wake up and then they can fly! And he goes on to say that that is how we should be when we walk with the Holy Spirit. Our lives as Christians should not be able to be explained any other way that "God did that, not man". And that is what I'm waiting for.
I'm so thankful that I have Jordan with me... we are one flesh, and are battling through this together as one. Learning to, anyway! :) Love you Jordan!
There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. --I John 4:18
Another thing I am going through is discerning His Voice above my own and satan's, because He promises that His sheep will know His Voice.. and I know I'm His sheep! :) yay!
Psalm 29 talks about the Voice of the Lord :)
